I feel as if my IQ dropped like 10, this year. I feel so stupid. I've come so close to failing. Even this guy in my class is doing better than I am, and he was failing last year. I hate social studies. I hate the teacher. I've done so crappy this year. I hate it. I hate myself for it. BLAH. I need to relax, but I can't. I really can't. I want to go play rugby, I want to play football, or something aggressive. I need to take my anger out on some sport. I need to let go. FRICK. I hate this. I hate exams. It's nothing more than a big ANXIETY attack for me. And probably everyone else.

I've notice how much I try to avoid guys, if I like him. I feel like such a bitch towards him. I don't know why. But that's how it's always been. I can't help it. I just feel the need to avoid them/him. I guess, I'm just afraid that he might like me back or something. I guess I'm just afraid that he's going to give me what I want, his love. bAH.