I wish I lived a happier life,
or a life where I was sure of everything.
Or a life where I took risks
I feel so "safe"

I feel like I should do a drug or something.
But not pot, cause' that's silly.
I don't know.
GAH.
I HATE MYSELF,
emo, or what?
BUT WHO CARES?!?!?
WHO BLOODY CARES?!
the world has corrupted us with such thoughts like that,
anyone who hates themselves are considered EMO and bloody attention seekers
JUST BECAUSE THAT PERSON GOT YOUR ATTENTION
doesn't mean that they're an attention seeker, loser.
People who just hate and not care, just needs someone who they can put down.
People need to get a life, and stop hating.
FRICK.
I need to love, and be loved.
I love hugging guys.
Especially Cody, and Daniel,
they're such cuties.
I'm not pessimistic, I just disagree with you.

I LOVE GUYS, hahahah.

I don't know, I want a boyfriend. I need that kind of attention right now,
I feel so damn lonely.
I feel as if I'm missing out from something.
I feel like I'm not pretty or attractive enough to be someone's girlfriend.
I hate it.
I need love.
I really do.
I hate seeing people who I'm close with have a closer relationship with someone else, and they say that they have a close relationship with me.
FRICK, I don't know freaking know.


I don't eeven know what my thoughts are on Christianity. It's somehting I, somewhat, believe in.

I wish sometimes I could just come right out and say everything, but really I can't
I can't trust the internet, but at the same time, I do, I really do.
I need to be PERFECT, in order to live a happy life, I NEED to stop contradicitng myself,
and be a hypocrite.
I need to be right
and feel superior.
I NEED to show off and be acknowledged for my perfections.
I don't need stress or high anxiety.

I just want to take time off from school and be happy and live life wihtout people knowing who I am.

I wish I was someone who nobody was friends with, but people really want to be friends with me.
I'd love that, cause' I'd love knowing that they're not my friends, cause' they can't, but really they want to be my friends, you know?!

I NEED TO SCREAM
and be one with karma.

I need to stop acting so bloody selfish, and be listened to.

I need to fix my imperfections to make them adequate.
I need to stop being embarassed about stupid things.

I wish my body was perfect.

I wish I was perfect, I wish everyone liked me,
I wish someone liked me more than a friend.

I WISH I COULD BE MORE CONFIDENT.

I want to drop out of my band... err bands, cause' I hate knowing that they're actually serious about it. Cause' I freak out and think that I'm not serious enough, which is true cause' I suck.

I feel like crying 24/7 but I don't, cause' I'm not that retarded.
I need to see a pychologist, and can't explain it to my parents that I do.

I wish I lived in China,
I wish something drastic happens to me,
and I'll get noticed.


I wish I got more noticed,
I wish I wasn't such a whore.
I wish my imperfection wasn't so noticable.
I wish I was skinnier.


I WISH I WAS SOMEONE ELSE, like Joce.

I wish I was prettier. I wish I was hotter, I wish I was perfect.







I NEED TO BE PERFECT TO BE HAPPY.
I NEED TO BE AWARE OF EVERYTHING
BLOOOOOODY HELL.
:(



JOCE AND I HELPED DANIEL PICK OUT CLOTHING TODAY!!