grad photos tomorrow

annnnnd,

I needd to get me some action ;)

I just don't even want to do anything anymore, because no one that I want to like it, ever likes it.

I just don't depend on people either, because they just don't care as much as I do.. which is not saying much, because I"m a fucking nut.

I just hate myself, and blah blah blah I hate my friends.

life sucks.. yada ydadayd asydasdfgklfj;

stfu jessica.

fuck, that I'm a brat.
fuck that i"m a bitch.

fuck that I always find things to be mad at.
I AM NEVER content, even if I do say that i am..

fuck it.

so, it's been awhile.

I've been smoking a lot more.
well haha, more frequently I should say.

I got my screw in, for my mouht yesturday. I was so disappointed when they were likje "okay you can put your retainer back in"
cause' I had thought that it was the day to get my new tooth, FINALLY.. but nope.
I think i get it in about 3 months, hopefully.

-_-"
but my dentist came to watch with his assistant, and he bought me a cake..


anyways, my life lately.

so I'm crushing on this boy name Ryan, from work. Fuck he's amazing.

But he's going out with Kelsey, who works in the same department as me, and it makes it awkward if they're both working on the same day..
werd

anyways, when Ryan and I are working ont he same day without Kelsey, we flirt like mad.
it's silly but I love it.
him and I would be so good togehter, but fuck. Things like this never works for me.

on Sunday, they put me in the fitting the whole day.. and Ryan was working as well.. he was pretty much in the fitting the whole time with me and stephanie..
it was so cute..
we just kept kidding around, and what not. He proposed to me, and he made me a ring out of a medium nub and tape, and I wore it the whoel day.. and when the tape ripped he noticed that it wasn't on my finger, and it's still in my pocket of my apron..

golly gee. And he was saying "I still have to smoke you up". I want to SO BAD, but I'm ALWAYS driving so I don't think I could ever blaze with him, unless it's during our break time at Winners, and i don't really know if I want to blaze durinf the break.. but who am I kidding, of course I want to.

but then again it would cut down my eating time..
whatever.

He's too cool.
spekaing of cool kids, KYLE GOT FIRED.. damnit. He called sonya a bitch indirectly. Tiffany told sonya and sonya got him fired. FUCK HER, she is a bithc. and it was totally prevoked by her for him to have said that.

She was listneing in to his conversation with someone else, and then she started saying things like "well that's because you're stupid" and then apparently she walked away and he said "well, that's becasue you're a bithc".. tiffany then went and snitched on him..

which was pretty hypociritical of TIffany becasue she went on a big rant about how she hated snitches and what not.. fuck that.


fuck my mouth hurts.

So i've defintiely cut off churhc.. I havn't been for like three months.. and I'm okay with that. It was just not my thing, and I feel sorry for my brother, who is forced to go every Sunday.


Anwyays, lately I've been having some sweet bonding time with Joe MacDougall. He's too cute.

I'm just catching up on like years of flirting that I havn't done before.

but fuck, both those guys are taken as ever.

I still got my rossy?!
hopefully. PS I'm planning on applying at Toys-R-Us after christmas. :)

HIm and I have this thing where i like pee on his mom's grave at night.. it was so cute.
Him and Ryan just makes me laugh and be happy the way that I just need to be.