I don't know what to think. i guess it's just that time again where things just never seem to make sense. and i just feel the way that i do.

it's a perpetual cycle, that i would like to be gone.


i don't know.

fuck man. i don't know. He's moving away, and i think that's why i'm backing off. I'm just sick of having people leave me. I'm done with Victoria; i feel like i'm friends with everyone i can be friends with in Victoria. There's no one else they can offer me really.


i was talking to kayla last night, regardless of stuck i feel here, i'm still going to miss it. I'm going to miss how beautiful it is here, and the fact that i can see EVERYTHING just from a tiny ass mnountain, is pretty comforting.

I'm going to miss the clean air, the sparse amount of people, and traffic. I'm going to miss just cruising around and being able to complete the course of victoria within the hour.

i'm going to miss bumping into someone i know everywhere i go.

i'm going to miss my home.

but if i move to vancouver i'm not going to miss it as much, but i'll still miss it.

i'm going to miss knowing where i am at all times. i'm going to miss knowing my way around.

it's a love-hate relationship: victoria, and i.




I really don't know why i'm feeling so down right now. I think it's because of the whole joe situation but i'm not really sure.

he messaged me the other on facebook, and it was pretty insincere. he kept saying "lol" and "hahahhah"

no thanks.



i sent him this HUGE ass message back bithcing him out. it made me feel better, but i dont' know.


at the same time i feel like shit. i dont' think it's because of that, but i think it is. i don't nkow.


what the fuck is wrong with me :(

I just want to be out and about right now. the weather is too nice to be spent inside.


i know that i'll still be feeling the same way when i'm out. i know that i'll still be feeling lonely. but honestly, i prefer to be lonely in a city where i don't know people, rather than feeling lonely in a city where i know a lot of people.


i know i'm young, and i'm probably just thinking pretty irrationally. but i don't want to be here anymore. there's too much drama. EVERYWHERE.