I can't help but feel as a human I have failed.

I have failed in every way possible.


that or I just live a different life then most people or something. Cause' for some reason I just feel pathetic all the fucking time, and it takes such a toll on me.

I just want someone who will love me as much as I will love them. Who's going to be there for me.


mainly, i just want a really good friend. ultimately i'll settle for that.

i dont get it. why is it so hard for me to let people love me?

no scratch that. Why is it that I feel like no one wants to put the time and effort to love me? or at least listen to me. :(

i'm soooooo sick of this. I'm so sick of this feeling. This continuous feeling of wanting to just fuck it and peace. I used to be a fighter. I used to be strong. Now I'm just a pussy not wanting to deal with her own problems. I let things get in the way.

I really don't know why i bother trying to talk to people. They never listen, hence why i've always kept to myself. Why do I try, I might as well just talk to myself. Cause' that's what I'm doing in the end. It's like talking to a fucking wall.


I hate how I'm just so fucking alone. I'm suck a lonely fuck and it sucks. I just want someone to listen to me, and have enough decency to listen to me, and maybe perhaps a miracle might happen and have them actually respond genuinely, and not make some fake shit up just to give you what you want to hear, and to have them avoid talking about shit.


this is what I miss about having friends that are girls. I miss being able to talk to them, not that I really did. But now our schedules conflict.


I hate people that wants to know because they want to know, not because they want to help. FUCK THAT BULLSHIT.


nothing but falsehopes. seriuosly.


that's fucked up. I hate people sometimes. I just want to live by myself, and just fucking die alone. Which i will anyways, so it's perfect, aint it??